If you meditate you know how hard it is. Not to master, but even to begin.
I’ve been actively meditating for about four years now. It ebbs and flows as all things. As you learn in yoga (or breathing exercises or meditation practice), the idea is that the techniques you learn on the mat are then built upon and become habits you apply to life off of the mat. Concepts like observing, letting go, learning to deal with adversity, overcoming challenges, and seeking your own truth.
The main stress of meditation practice is to empty your brain of all thought. If a thought comes up, you are to observe it and release it. Let go. Do not get attached. It’s much easier said than done. In the beginning it is actually more helpful to pick one word or idea to focus on to help train yourself. I have a word I chose very early on in practice that I still use when find myself wandering a bit. I should say a word that chose me. To do so, be still, concentrate on your breathing, feel the energy from a chakra of your choice (heart, third eye, crown), & let the word emerge, then focus on it. Use it as a grounding force when other thoughts try to get in.
I practice yoga & meditation at lunch time which is a nice way to reset my day, but can also be challenging to release the dreaded to do list. Sometimes in meditation I will find a thought like “remember to send that email” creeping in. Sometimes if there is not a lack of focus (which is better than a focus in meditation) an internal dialogue starts of “release the thought, why did I ruin my meditation with my to do list”, which can tailspin into the I am not good enough camp.
Today when my thoughts disrupted my practice and I tried to observe & release, before the internal chatter started, I felt a mantra emerge from deep within “I will stay worthy through the hustle.” And just like that the peace returned and a new charge inspired me. The description of what happened in these last few sentences literally all happens in a matter of two seconds. For this, I am so thankful for my practice and what it has taught me. It can be so revealing. Everyone has rotten days but there are not many I can think of where I do not leave my mat feeling better off. More accurately, a majority of the time it leads to greater energy, more inspiration and a strong sense of worthiness.
So that thought to stay worthy through the hustle? I interpret it to mean, yes we have our to do lists and our unending amount of tasks left to get to, but that does not make us any less worthy. We are our own worst critics, we think about what we are not doing and what we could be doing better. We can stay in the hustle, continue chasing our goals, or checking off our lists, and still be considered whole. Still be present. Still be worthy of all the goodness life has to offer us. Even through the challenges.
I think recently with the new year and the expectations that brings, as well as the current turmoil in the political environment, it’s easy to become extremely self critical and almost feel guilty. I know I experience those moments and have to rely on my teachings, what I know of myself, & work through to manage the emotions.
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I am recording this here as I would like to add this to my 2017 traveler’s notebook, but also to help anyone else with their meditation practice.
the Paper goddess 